Galaxy Racers Let's Talk About Episode 1 & 2 (LTA)

Archive-Kid: Galaxy Racers Notes/Rants

I’d hate to change this blog’s name to Archive-Kid Reviews, Recommendations, Ramblings, and Rants, so I won’t. I don’t like rants and I don’t like ranting because to me it sounds like I'm looking for attention, rather than making a discussion. But with today's topic, I needed something to call this because it certainly isn't a discussion, more like a therapeutic release. I need some regular content on the blog and I need some sort of punishment for whenever I don’t post something once a week. So this is going to be me sharing my notes on a show called Galaxy Racers. This show is absolutely terrible and it takes me about an hour just to finish watching one episode because I’m constantly pausing to write notes and thoughts. The first episode gave me about two pages of notes, the second gave me about five. This show is that bad and for some reason it's on Amazon video, Tubi tv (which is where I’m watching it because its for free and it’s not on Hulu and I’m too cheap and broke to pay for some other video service), and most importantly it has about 50 something episodes. It also comes from Korea or China and I don't know what they have there but if they let this have 50 something episodes then they must not have anything better. 

Warning, strong language used. I never intended for anyone to see these notes so they might be a bit scrambled, so I'll edit them the best I can so they make sense as well as ’add in a few recent notes that will be in parentheses.  

Now a little back story, I’ve tried numerous times to write a review for this show, back when I saw it on a kids app called Toon Goggles that had only two episodes of it. Toon Goggles later removed it before I could write that review and by that point, I had watched it so many times I didn’t want to think about it anymore. Not until I found that this series was available through the Tubi TV streaming service did I decide to try and write a review for it again. 

As I said before the first episode gave me about 2 pages of notes. So, instead of going through the trouble of taking all my notes and turning them into a neat and well-written review for the entire series, I’d rather just share my notes for the episodes I have watched so far and every episode I will watch in the future. This will be easier for me.

Now let’s get on with it, starting with episode 1. 

Galaxy Racer Notes

The intro: the scenes of the intro, some look interesting, some don’t. The music is nothing special just a generic fanfare riff. (The intro music is just a bunch of trumpets if I remember right, it sounds like the music you would hear for a lucha libre promo.) Don’t forget about the animal powers that the cars have shown in the intro (Snake and a flaming lion are shown but what they do is not shown). When do they show up in the series exactly? (past me asks) {Hell if I know!}(Answers watching episode 3 present me}

Episode 1

Earth uninhabitable so they (humans) packed up and moved into the Leo system or to the Leo planet. 

Titan Enterprises, On Planet Titan, the bad guys. Tax the head of Titan Enterprises wants to rule the other planets. (His name is TAX? Well when you think about it that actually makes a little sense, I mean there’s nothing more terrifying than taxes!)

The Flaming Lion, a car created by Roy’s father (Roy the main character) who doesn’t want to give it to Taz (was it Taz or Tax. I feel like Autocorrect is responsible for this.) because of his evil ambitions, so he runs away and then “may” have died, but could still be alive, you know how this schtick goes, the main character’s Daddy is supposedly dead but he’s really just a dead beat.

Roy somehow has the necklace that his father had, god knows how he got it we just see it around his neck when he wakes up with. (It’s also unknown how long his father has been missing/dead. The necklace has some sort of importance, I think it does anyway.)

Roy works as a delivery boy for his grandfather’s noodle shop. While Roy is supposed to be going to school his grandfather calls him and tells him to come back and make a delivery, keeping him from school. (I’m not kidding either, also his business is doing pretty well so it's not like he desperately needs Roy’s help, he can let him go to school) I’m not entirely sure if Roy was really going to school or going somewhere else as his friend Cindy who after getting a face full of chocolate ice cream after Roy uses the shortcut known as going down the stairs on a bike, states that she will walk to school. (Cindy: age unknown, gender: annoying female, character: UNLIKABLE AS SHIT!!!!) 

Roy’s father contacts his father -Roy’s grandfather- before he “DIES”. (Again its a schtick, Star Wars, Darth Vader is Luke’s father and he’s alive, but not all that well.)

Mr. Important, from Titans Enterprise, talks with Roy’s Grandpa asking him about the invention. He wants the invention to give it to Taz (so it is Taz. Damn You AutoCorrect!). After ordering a bowl of noodles Mr. Important slides Grandpa a check for a certain amount of money in hopes of that he’ll give him what he wants. However, Grandpa throws the check in the fireplace and tells him to finish his noodles then leave. Mr. Important tells Grandpa if he won’t play then neither will anyone in his family and bans everyone in his family from racing, that family being just Roy. If they race there will be consequences. (Something that came to mind is why Taz wants the Flaming Lion so much. How exactly is a racing car going to help him conquer the other planets?)

Power Rex and Flame Lion- created by Roy’s father. (Taz has the Power Rex car if I remember right. There is a lot I can get into about certain things that are unanswered but I don’t feel like doing it right now, maybe in some ending ruminations.)

Galaxy, Cindy’s older brother, is a racer and a DICK (A huge one).  At first, he seemed like a nice guy. He disciplines his sister and encourages a young racer to be the best. He seemed like a regular role model. Speaking of the young racer he encouraged, a fat kid with red hair and freckles, I think we see him again in another episode where he races against Roy (episode 3). Galaxy starts out as a nice person then becomes a giant throbbing COCKMAN after Roy accidentally, almost miraculously, destroys his car. (I don’t like Galaxy. He’s part of the reason I don’t like Cindy.)

Thundering Hawk - Jack’s car, a racer from planet eagle. Jack is mentioned, but he is never seen in episode one and probably won't be brought up again. Thundering hawk the car that Galaxy uses and the one that Roy destroys, how I’ll get into later. The exact amount of time Galaxy had this car isn’t specified. I originally assumed he had it for only a couple weeks but thinking about it he might have just bought it. The only thing he says is that he’s given it a lot of thought and thinks it's the best car for him. 

How does Roy smash it? Well, Roy takes a shortcut to make his delivery on time, but this shortcut leads to him pulling an E.T. (the movie) flying right off a damn cliff, over trees and through a few of them. Then somehow through the grace of God or Satan, he lands right on top of Galaxy’s small car, which is about the size of a tv remote that, might I add, is moving at top speed on a race track. Roy completely totals the piece of plastic on wheels. (I assume they’re made of plastic because this thing goes to pieces.) 

The narrator at the end of the episode says that Roy smashed Galaxy’s Favorite Car. Favorite Car implying that he has more than one I would assume. Meaning the Thundering Hawk wasn’t his only car but it was his favorite and that it could possibly be that he has a number of other cars and finally decided that the Thundering Hawk is the one that works best for him. Meaning that he could have gone through 2 or 3 other cars before finally deciding to try a Thundering Hawk. 

(WARNING: Galaxy Rant Inbound! Read at your own risk!)

This is where I get really angry with Galaxy’s character. I might be over exaggerating but I’ve watched these episodes too many times and I just need to express my disgust. Galaxy goes from nice to a complete jerk. Just down talking Roy and acting like something of an antagonist. Losing his car wasn’t that big a deal, I can understand him being upset that something he may have just recently purchased was smashed to pieces but he's going totally overboard. These things are mass produced and he has a job so he can just buy a new one. His sister was even able to get a discount on one, more on that later. He works for the same shop that sells the damn thing. His sister is just a club member, he actually works there. He should be able to get some sort of employee discount. At the same time, I’m not defending Roy. Roy’s crappy personality and inability to act like a decent human being might explain Galaxy’s attitude towards him. In the end, it’s all due to bad writing and bad characterization that makes Galaxy, Roy and Cindy extremely dislikable. 

 This is just straight up bad!!! And the outro music is the saddest thing I’ve ever heard in a racing show, it doesn't fit at all. What the shit! (Chill out and breathe, past me.) What is this? The intro is just fanfare and the outro is sad as hell? (Yeah, I was annoyed at this point and extremely sick of rewatching the first episode)

 Observations: The animation is awful, the best I can describe it i’s really cheap.

Assumptions: Roy’s car is going to be the Flaming Lion but when will it appear ?????? (Present Me Says: Hell if I know!)

What do I think: I like the scene with Mr. Important that drives a car like a coffin and Grandpa with no name. I like the bad guy feeling during this scene. I also like how Grandpa just takes the check and throws it in the fireplace basically saying eat your noodles, then fuck off. Of course, that would be the only thing I like in the entire episode. I did like the overused enterprise bad guy who wants something from the protagonist’s father trope, but I only like that because it’s just cut and dry or cut and paste. 

Impressed: HA!

Interested: In how bad it gets, and how long it will take for me to bust my tv in with my head.

Encouraged to watch more: Hell NO! The only thing that they call encouragement in this episode is to see if whether or not Galaxy will take Roy’s bike and start beating him with it. (Spoilers: It doesn’t happen)

Final thoughts of the first episode: How did this series get SO MANY episodes? Jesus, they must not have anything better in China or anything else period. (This show is from 2006, thank you IMDB.)

Character Motivations 

Character personalities  

(something to keep in mind for later)

Reminder: anything within parentheses is newly added in, AKA present thoughts.

So that was the notes for episode one. Episode 2 gets more into Cindy and Galaxy about how useless Cindy is and how much of an asshat Galaxy is. 

Galaxy Racers Notes

Episode 2: Could it get better? NO!

Happening on a race at the racing club, 

Roy lands on Galaxy’s car and this somehow triggers Roy to have a flashback of his grandfather telling him that the greatest thing about noodles is that they deliver no matter where they are. Why is this flashback here? What does this have to do with the present situation? This isn’t even the time for a flashback.

Galaxy, Cindy and Galaxy’s two disciples that he was racing against yell stop and wait as Roy begins walking away as if they aren’t talking to him. Roy stops for a second but begins to run away when he sees the angry bulls running towards him. When they catch him they ask “Why are you running?” Which he clearly is even though technically he’s riding. Anyway, Roy replies that he’s not running, he’s delivering noodles. Roy’s filled with focus and determination to deliver those noodles. (He’s either as big of an ass as Galaxy is or just a moron.)

Galaxy continues acting like a complete asshat (Continuously berating Roy, if memory serves). Now is a good time to bring up a small grievance I have with Galaxy’s fashion choice. Galaxy is wearing a dumb ass racing suit? (A racing suit, he wears a racing suit to pilot what is basically an RC car with an oversized remote control.)

Cindy gets in between the two, Roy and Galaxy, to keep a fist fight from breaking out. Galaxy demands that Roy pay for his car. Roy, on the other hand, has another idea, he’ll fix his car. Galaxy and company laugh and walk away, with Galaxy telling a sad looking Cindy that he doesn’t want her hanging around people like Roy. (Can I bring up here that, and I know I’ve already brought this up, at this point we don’t know if Roy has any sort of love or even an interest in racing, he’s never even brought it up nor was it brought up to him. However, now he thinks he can fix this smashed car that he may or may not have any knowledge about. That's like me trying to say I can fix a real car.) 

Roy tries to fix Galaxy’s car but to no avail, it’s completely totaled. THE SUBJECT OF SAVING MONEY TO BUY HIS GRANDFATHER A GODDANG RADIO IS INTRODUCED HERE. Why is this important? Why is this a thing? (It isn’t brought up in episode 1, and as I said previously his grandfather’s business is doing pretty well, so he can buy himself a radio if he wanted to, one better than the one he already has. Yes, he already has a radio.)

Side note: The animation seems to reuse character designs a bit. (Some characters look the same as others, like earlier when I mentioned the chubby kid with red hair and freckles is seen again in episode 3. I’m not sure if it is the same kid but I wouldn’t doubt it if the animators just reused character designs.)

Cindy tries being nice to Roy and offers to help fix Galaxy’s piece of purple plastic, by standing around and telling him about what makes the Thundering Hawk no normal car. For one, it has a hard base, with a light body and sensitive controls, plus its shaped perfectly for speed. (I don’t know how telling Roy this will help him fix it, but thank you for being useless Cindy!) Roy gives up on trying to fix it and despairs as he also won’t be able to pay for it. In his own words “I don’t have enough for even half of the car.” (Because over glorified RC cars cost way more than a radio.) Galaxy would have to wait six months for Roy to be able to get enough money to pay him. Is it just me or am I making Roy sound like he owes money to the mob?

Animation mistake No. 1: Galaxy borrows his disciple’s pink car. However, during the race, a scene of the Thundering Hawk is used instead of the pink car.

Cindy asks the nice man (Owner of the shop that sells cars, if my memory is correct) how many Thundering Hawks he has left. Side Note: The animation shows a pink car like before unless the pink car is also a Thundering Hawk just with a different color scheme, but that would be dumb. (I’m talking about the Thundering Hawk that's for sale.) The nice man tells Cindy he has one left and that she gets a 20% discount, but she still wouldn’t have enough. So she can be able to buy the Thundering Hawk (with her money by the way not Roy’s little piggy bank change), she’s having her boss, the nice man, pay her in advance so she can afford it.

Side Note: At certain points, a character’s eyes get super huge.

So, Cindy buys the last Thundering Hawk and gives it to Roy. Roy then calls Galaxy stupid which angers Cindy (and further confuses me as to whether Roy is either an idiot or just a jerk). Cindy says that car meant everything in the world to Galaxy. A hunk of plastic that can be replaced means everything to him, even more than his sister. The guy's dick must be microscopic, along with his self-esteem, if a plastic car means everything to him, poor bastard. (To be fair, shows that are tied to a toy line are set in a world where the toy is a big thing, or at least taken seriously to some extent. Yugioh, Medabots, Beyblade, Pokemon, Scan2go, B-Daman, Opti-Morphs, all are set in a universe where people actually see their “thing,” for lack of a better term, like a real sport. Which is why I can understand Galaxy’s car being everything to him. However, the show has done a terrible job of actually showing that people care about these dumb plastic cars. We’ve barely seen any racing.) By the way, Cindy is annoying! (Because she doesn’t stand up for her friend when Galaxy berates him.)(To add, Galaxy’s dream or aspirations are never shown, you can assume he’s the “I want to be the best there ever was” schtick but still it's not shown. It could have been shown with Cindy talking about how hard he works to try and get better at racing so he could reach his goals and sees Roy as someone who just crushed his dream and for that matter didn’t apologize. On that note, Roy might be sociopathic or just a person with no remorse.)

Roy apologizes for insulting her brother (Damn you, proving me wrong), even though the dudes a flaming bag of plastic douche to the level of Assholeo! Has the assemble the new car. (I was aggravated at this point, and not thinking clearly. I meant to say that Roy assembles the new car. May I also add, shows with a toy being an actual “Thing” that people care about, would usually give some information about the “thing.” Like how it’s put together or what something does or how this affects that or the different pieces that you can mix and match. This doesn’t happen here, even though it's the perfect opportunity. However, I’m not entirely sure that Galaxy Racers has any sort of toy line. I could do some research but I’d rather not as finding info about this is{……….Just did it, found nothing,  and as I was about to say a waste of time})

Cindy asks for some gratitude, for saving his ass. (Thank you gratitude not favors, ya sickos). Anyway, she instructs Roy on how to put it together even though he already knows (no he doesn’t, where did I get that from). This part between Cindy and Roy putting the car together was the perfect opportunity to teach the audience about how the cars are put together and how they work. However, it doesn’t happen. (Side note, there hasn’t been much racing, and this is episode 2. This is a show about racing and it takes them to episode 3 to actually get to some racing. It’s like if you waited until episode 3 of the Power Rangers to see any fighting.)

Galaxy is racing with the pink car, frustrated that he can’t join the Galaxy Race without a race car. (Ah, so he is a schtick. Also, what is the Galaxy Race? It’s self-explanatory, I would guess.) Again, the Thundering Hawk was his favorite car, meaning he must have used a number of others and should possibly own some other cars. (This wouldn’t be a problem if they made it clear that this was his ONLY car. Maybe, let the audience see that he can’t get used to other cars because he’s been using the Thundering Hawk for so long. Make it where his big chance to have his dream come true is on the horizon and then here comes Roy on his big wheels to crush them. Without seeing stuff like that, Galaxy comes off as, say it with me, an Asshat.)

Questions: Where does Cindy work? Answer: At the (“Racing”) club, I would assume and the person she bought the car from, who is her boss, is the owner of the club but these answers are all assumed. (Nothing is made clear.)

Mr. Club Boss comes around and asks Galaxy what happened to his (Galaxy’s) Thundering Hawk. Galaxy just tells him it’s not around and asks if he had a spare. The boss tells him that Cindy just bought the last one.

The animation is crap (To get a picture in your heads, there is a scene when Roy throws some money on top of his desk. The angle from what's in the background and the money in the foreground don't match with each other so it looks like the money is laying on an unseen table while Roy's desk is some kind of backdrop.) Roy asks Cindy why she’s helping him to which she replies that she’s repaying the favor. With that we then flashback to when she used to be afraid of the high jump. Afraid isn’t the right word more like she used to be bad at the high jump. Note: she did the high jump wearing a short skirt, can you say don’t give a fuck about panty flashing! Roy comes around and puts weights on her ankles to help strengthen her legs. At one point it looks like she’s trying to take off like an airplane spreading her arms out and running down the track. With her legs stronger she was able to jump higher. Cindy says that with Roy’s help she was able to do it, pass gym class that is. Question: Was this a school thing? (Answer: it’s assumed cause we never see the two at school or in a classroom.)

Roy falls asleep during Cindy’s story ( Dumbass Jackass). Cindy pulls on Roy's ear and tells him to go home and sleep in his bed. Cindy, I feel the more episodes we go into the more apparent it will be about why I find her so annoying. One thing that I can say right now is that her voice is really annoying. When she first speaks she sounds like a shrieking whiner. (Cindy also doesn’t defend Roy against Galaxy. The real reason which I discovered after thinking about it so much is that she is basically useless and that she’s related to Galaxy, who seemed like a nice guy at first met him didn’t seem at all like a bully or a flaming douche bag (an asshat, not a douchebag). After his car gets destroyed, his good behavior goes out the window and he becomes a complete asshat who constantly berates Roy. (Although Roy has it coming with his infuriating “can’t act like a decent human being” attitude. Would you believe that at some points they try to make Roy seem like a victim, even though he caused this crap with Galaxy’s car? If you want my opinion, if she really wanted to help Roy and repay him for helping her with the high jump then she should have stuck up for the guy she calls her friend, and tell Galaxy, excuse the strong language, to take the new car that she bought for him and fuck the fuck off. But she doesn’t she submits to her brother’s will and walks away with him.)

There is a voice used for chubby background characters and it doesn’t sound like it fits the face, it’s way too high and feminine. Though I really doubt there is any voice that could be a match for the ugly faces of some of these characters, background or foreground.

Roy finally shows up with Cindy in tow to give Galaxy the new Thundering Hawk. Immediately, Roy starts picking a fight with Galaxy telling him he won’t give him the car. (For no reason other than just to be a Jackass. That's it! It’s confirmed. Roy is as dumb as you think he is to the point of being a know nothing jerk. Which makes it all the worse.) Cindy gets in between and tells Roy to stop messing around. Roy: an annoying idiot that likes to mess around a lot, with screwed up motivations due to the crappy writing. 

Long story short, Galaxy reveals that he knew Cindy bought the car to which Cindy claims that she built it for Roy which she clearly didn’t, she told him how to put it together and say blah, blah, though it doesn’t help the situation in the slightest telling him that. Galaxy is still acting like a complete douche wiz (Asshat sounds better). Roy says that Galaxy should thank him, (okay, before I sort of agreed, but thinking about it, no Galaxy should not thank Roy. In this situation, Roy should be the one to apologize and be sorry for smashing Galaxy’s car, even if Galaxy is a giant asshat. Actually, if there is anyone who needs to be thanked its Cindy, she bought the car so Roy and Galaxy should thank her for being a mature adult, term loosely used, and pulling both their butts out of the fire) but instead Galaxy just turns to Cindy and orders her not to hang out with a piece of trash. “Stop getting so upset Roy," says Cindy. She is so annoying right now. She should tell her brother not to be a dickhole. (Asshat, he is an asshat, and here is where my dislike for Cindy was born. She tells Roy not to get upset at an asshat who barely knows him and is just berating him because he smashed his hunk of purple plastic on wheels by ACCIDENT. Galaxy got himself a new car so he should just tell Roy to be more careful or if he doesn’t approve of Roy he could just be a nice big brother and tell Cindy he doesn’t like her hanging out with a delinquent as he would be a bad influence. Roy is not a good character, nor is Galaxy. Wait! I just realized something. This whole situation adds up to absolute bull. What does it have to do with anything about Galaxy Racers?)

Roy is akin to dickwiz (Dumbass Jackass), Cindy is an annoying character on account of that she is useless at this point, being Roy's only friend that doesn't try to stick up for him when her brother bashes him and Galaxy is an asshat plain and simple. (Finally got it right!) 

This scene ends with a fade out of Roy telling Cindy that she can make up her own mind, and standing on the sidewalk looking down like a victim (which I want to say bullshit but he kinda is, even though he started this. Galaxy acts like a complete jerk to Cindy, actually ordering her not to hang out with Roy and to follow him. To top it off he does this all while still berating Roy. So I guess Roy is kind o’f a victim, it's just the way he acts makes me want to say that he brought it on himself, he should be happy I dislike Galaxy as much as I do. P.S. These are terribly unlikable characters with no redeeming qualities, this is not a good sign for episodes 1 and 2 cause it can only get worse. Let's not forget that this situation is completely meaningless as it has nothing to do with Galaxy Racing. Think about it, if I were to watch this on a Saturday morning block I would think that I would see some racing in the first episode. Instead, I see Roy delivering noo’dles and smashing Galaxy's car. Okay, then episode two should have some racing. Nope, jus’t more of the same meaningless crap. If you don't hook them at episode two then you've messed up cause not many people want to continue watching something that is just wasting their time and not giving them what they want to see.) 

Back in his bedroom, Roy lays on his bed and has a flashback to the scene that just happened. Then Roy hears something outside his room. He peeks out discovering the house to have been ransacked and sees a man running out the front door. He chases after him on his bike but the man is moving like Sonic T. Hedgehog. Roy should be able to catch up to him on his bike, but he doesn’t, as rolling over a tiny rock sends his bike flying up into the air akin to E.T. flying in front of the full moon. (I’m not kidding, he flies so high off the ground from rolling over a tiny pebble on the sidewalk). Gravity then wants to come out of retirement as his front wheel falls off, and Roy is brought back down to the ground along with his bike. 

Okay, so it seems as though Roy is flying high off the ground and I mean really high (which is what I think the people who made this show were, really, really high). In reality, Roy is really no more than a few meters high (smoke weed every day, in legal states and responsibly). (For that matter, how does one tiny rock send him flying in the air, riding off a cliff makes sense but a tiny rock should just make him lose balance and fall off his bike). These scenes are inconsistent. It looks as though Roy is high off the ground in one scene, then the next he’s only a few meters off the pavement. His front wheel lands as though it dropped from higher overhead, also I think it lands on the ground after Roy does. I don’t care how that works. On that note how the hell did the wheel fall off? (They didn’t show his bike being sabotaged or even a bolt coming loose, and it didn’t appear to be damaged by Galaxy’s car in any way in episode 1). Another note, earlier Roy told Galaxy that he should try to fix his bike and now throws his actually damaged bike to the ground and for that matter, even earlier in episode one he was carrying Cindy’s big ass on the back of the damned thing. The thing’s damaged because of you Roy, fix your own shit. (Another note: How the hell does he think a purple plastic RC car is going to damage a mountain bike?)

Grandpa comes home to find the front door open and the house in a mess. Just then, he gets a phone call from Mr. Important who drives a car that looks like a coffin from episode 1 (I forget what the phone call was about. I think he reminded him about the Ley family being banned from racing). The Ley family being banned from racing is kinda stupid. So they can’t race, what’s the big deal? They can do anything else except race. They can even become CEO of an even bigger company then buy your company in a hostile takeover and become your boss. This is stupid. What makes it so important that the Ley family can’t race, neither grandpa or Roy show any sort of interest in racing at all. Is racing like a drug addiction? Do people need to get their fix off motorized plastic car racing? That would explain Galaxy’s reaction to Roy smashing his car. (Roy has not shown any sort of interest in racing or cars, I know I've said this but I can't stress it enough that the main character of a show called Galaxy Racers doesn't show even the slightest curiosity for what the show is about.)

Animation note: a lot of scenes will zoom in on a face and use stress lines to give it more intensity. It’s used way too much and its just there to make the situation seem interesting and intense, but all it really does is make this show even dumber. Also, still no Flaming Lion (or mention of it, to what I can remember).

Grandpa (I don’t think Grandpa has an actual name other than Grandpa or old man) makes Roy promise that he will never get into racing. “You mean the little cars that all the kids play with outside?” asks Roy. This line annoys me. Those same little cars are what Galaxy plays with, the same cars are owned by people called Legendary Racers and the same cars are used in big races that we, the audience, have yet to see. There’s even a big evil company at the head of it, that’s how big this thing is.  This Is Stupid! Roy, you are dumb, not just you but this entire show. Obviously this “galaxy racing” is somewhat of a big deal if you can make a big corporation out of it, or could it be that in this universe Nascar racing is done with tiny plastic RC cars. (My point is that those little cars and racing are supposed to be a big deal but Roy downplays it as if it’s just some kind of kids toy) Roy says don’t worry “I hate those stupid little toy cars.” (Go to hell, Roy!) He hasn’t even shown a tiny bit of interest or knowledge or desire for racing and has already decided he hates it after the whole Galaxy incident. For that matter, Roy doesn’t even have a car, how the hell is he going to race.

Question: Roy says that if his Grandfather knew about what happened with Galaxy he would have tried to help him. Now I ask WHY DIDN’T HE ASK HIM FOR HELP!? (Cause he’s dumb that's why. Think about it, there is no reason he shouldn’t or couldn’t have asked his Grandfather for help. It’s not like Roy got in a fight and smashed Galaxy car just to be a jerk. He smashed it entirely, miraculously, on accident so there’s no reason for his Grandpa to get mad at him, other than being an idiot and riding over a freaking cliff.)

Roy decides he’ll listen to Big Granddaddy Noodles and puts the old Thundering Hawk parts in the trash. Then remembering that he wanted to buy his grandfather a dumb radio, digs the car parts out of the trash and somehow puts them together. (I don’t know how he did it and I don't care.) Roy also begins to enjoy putting back what should not be salvageable. After all his work the car has no casing, the purple shell, and he names it the Dark Lord. (Go to hell, Roy. You’re not clever, just because the thing is all black doesn’t make it a “dark lord,” it makes it a piece of shit) Roy sneaks out of the house to the LEGENDARY SIMULATION TRACK! To con some poor sucker and get the money for his Grandpa’s new radio that he so desperately needs and rightly deserves. Roy doesn’t race and just now actually enjoyed putting the car together. How does he even know about the legendary simulation track?  If a person who doesn’t really care about racing know about this simulation track then it doesn’t make it legendary, especially when he can easily ride there on his bike. 

The “dark lord”: it’s supposed to have no casing, however in a few close-up shots its shown with a purple casing. This animation is terrible. 

Did I mention the outro, it has no credits and uses the saddest music I have ever heard in a frickin’ outro. 

What do I think: This is a diaper full of shit and I hate it. But I shall persevere. 

Roy’s necklace is not present in this episode. (I realize at the end)

Afterthoughts:

So I went back and watched a scene from episode 2 and realized that when I was writing notes I left a few things out and made Roy sound worse than what he actually is. He’s still bad, but he does have some good points for reasons that I’m about to get into. I’m not going to go back and correct myself. Instead, I’m just going to quickly explain what Roy was supposed to be and what the hell is wrong with him. 

Now, Roy is the main character and the writers were going for the troublemaking kid that can come across as somewhat of a jerk but really just an idiot who actually has a lot of heart. I did mention that he makes deliveries for his grandfather but he's also nice to other people, he’s even nice to Cindy. The only person he’s a jerk to is Galaxy because he’s a complete ass. In episode 2 when Roy gives Galaxy the new car, Galaxy doesn’t say thank you, not even to Cindy, his sister who bought the car and claimed she put it together, though Roy claimed the neighbor girl did. By the way, the only person shown building the thing is Roy. Getting off topic, Galaxy barks at Cindy to come on and this angers Roy, who gets in front of Galaxy and tells him that he should say thank you. Galaxy then berates him. 

Okay, so I will admit Roy does have good points and Galaxy is a bigger jerk than I remembered. Now the reason I was annoyed with Cindy is that she doesn’t stand up for Roy or herself, although that could be her character development. However, I doubt it, this shows writing, among other things, is absolutely terrible. This is what is wrong with Roy and especially Galaxy. Roy should be a troublemaking goof off kid but instead, he’s a moron. Galaxy, in the beginning, seemed like a nice guy and didn’t seem at all like a jackass and its only after Roy smashes his car does he go from nice to crap. Especially with the way he acts, everything he does is just jackassery.

I’m sure if I rewatched, for the 3rd or maybe 4th time, episodes 1 and 2 that I would notice so much more and have even more pages of notes to edit. However, it won’t matter because this show is so bad that it can actually be distracting. The terrible animation, the dumb story, and let's not forget the pacing that waits until episode 3 for there to be any actual racing. I remember when I was writing notes that I was constantly pausing. I went from lazy sentences to strong sentences to paragraphs about a topic that I wanted to discuss and wanted to get the thought out and then going off into a tangent about another topic. You begin to dwell on the bad because you’re drowning in it. 

I was actually going to try and do a full series review of this. I swear, the review itself, no the notes would go so far, I would need to write chapters and an index just to find anything, that's how long that would be. I do not recommend this to anyone. I don’ even feel like you could even watch it with friends while you’re drunk or high, or on crack. It lasts for 50 something episodes and probably gets worse. 

One final note: The only type of car that we see is the Thundering Hawk. Its the only car with a name that is seen. Cindy, when she was describing the body of the car to Roy, said that it was absolute perfection and it bothers me. These cars are mass produced. The Thundering Hawk is massed produced and she calls it perfection. I can understand that maybe it’s just her opinion but we don’t even see the thing up against any other named cars. I’m so used to these types of shows having gadgets that are one of a kind and nobody else has one. Even in Medabots, a show about mass produced robots that kids use to battle each other made it clear that no two Medabots are the same. This Thundering Hawk is nothing special. Its massed produced. If one of them is perfect then they’re all perfect and anyone can go to Walmart and pick one up. I would let this slide if Galaxy’s car had some custom work done to it, but they never say if it did. He also takes the new one which was built with the pieces that it came with, so that theory is shot down. All the Thundering Hawk is, is just a mass produced car with some good qualities. Maybe it's an expensive type of car? For the price that I’m thinking of, there is no way in hell that Cindy could have that much money, even with the discount and the advance. Think about it like this, if Air Jordans were guaranteed to give you better basketball skills, wouldn’t everybody want them and not other kinds of shoes. If the Thundering Hawk is perfection, then what about the other cars. 

Now, see what I mean about tangents and dwelling on the bad. The more I watch the first two episodes the more I analyze. I could write an entire book on the do’s and don’ts of toy tie-in shows using this as an example of what not to do. This shows is that bad and I’m done talking about these episodes. 

I’ll see you again after I watch episodes 3, 4, and 5. 

The is the Dragon D.J. D-ArchiveKid saying

Peace

Out